Some people argue who have been in prison can become good citizens later and it is often argue that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about dangers of committing a crime to what is extent do you agree or disagree

#people #prison #citizens #teenagers #dangers #crime

Behaviour

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The behaviour

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of criminal person after spend

thier

Correct your spelling

their

time in

prison

totallychanges

Correct your spelling

totally changes

either it will be a kind-hearted or more dangerous. Few individual believe that person after come back from

prison

can become a responsible citizen and work as

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ideal for teenagers by telling them different consequences of committing the

crime

. I moderately agree with

this

statement.

This

essay will discuss both parameters of

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the

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ide. On the positive side,

this

personperson

Correct your spelling

person person

person-person

can become ideal for young student because they can share their own experience and the

onsequences

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consequences

of involving in

crime

.It is often found that hum,

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show examples

mind prefer to listen to those things which come from reality .

For example

, a criminal ion my country after spending 5 years in person now become a youth icon . Before that was used to sell drugs and taking too but now he is totally different he opens many rehab centre and awareness camps for teenagers of taking drugs.

Thus

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show examples

erson

Correct your spelling

person

can

also

become an ideal citizen with

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show examples

hange in his thinking. On the adverse side, people who commit

crime

even after

prison

their mentality level changes. They can be become more dangerous for society and often start doing more crimes.In

Remove the article

apply

show examples

recent research done on prisoners of

Tehad

Correct your spelling

Thad

prison

shows that, 70 % of

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the

show examples

risoner being involved more and more crimes after their

first

crime

.So there presence to society can become problems and

also

involve

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ot of teenagers in

crime

because prefer to involve more easily in bad things than

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ood one. In conclusion,where a prisoner can become a youth icon but

also

be the

the

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

who is ruining the life of teenagers.

Submitted by jaswalranjit35 on Sat Nov 28 2020

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

273 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

prisoners
rehabilitation
recidivism
consequences
insights
deterrent
guidance
support
role models
positive change

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Some people argue who have been in prison can become good citizens later and it is often argue that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about dangers of committing a crime to what is extent do you agree or disagree

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some people think foreign visitors should be charged more than local person when they visit the cultural and historical attractions in a country. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

A foreign friend of yours plans to visit your place and stay with you,but you are not available on that date.give your friend another alternative date for the visit.In your letter,you should,apologise for it.Explain what you are doing on that date suggest to her an alternate time to come.

Since it is so easy to reach a large audience on the internet, people have to be exceptionally talented to become famous these days. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree er disagree with this statement?