Some people say that what children watch influence their behavior. Other believe the amount of time they spend on television influences their behavior most. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

It is difficult to decide whether the volume of
time
which children spend on
TV
e
veryday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
has more effect on their b
ehaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
show examples
or the
content
include in
TV
shows. From my point of view,
although
the length of
time
which children watch
TV
in daily life do affect them, I still believe that the
content
of
TV
programs has more marked influences i
n
Verify preposition usage
on
show examples
kids. On the one hand, it is hardly denied that the
content
showed in almost all television programs may have impacts on the cognitive development among children.
First
of all, the kids’ channels play an important role in spreading and explaining a wide range of concept and phenomenon in a
n appropriate ways
Correct the article-noun agreement
an appropriate way
appropriate ways
show examples
to the very young people.
For example
, discovery for kids can be seen as a bridge them to t
he n
Change the article
apply
show examples
ature, which benefits the viewers in terms of opening their mind to comprehend the very
first
complicated piece of knowledge relating to wildlife.
In contrast
, m
isbehaviors
Change the spelling
misbehaviours
show examples
among children are
also
the consequence of engaging in the
content
broadcasted on the television. Obviously, it is impossible to censor all of the images,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
or manners from the cartoons like Tom and Jerry series.
This
might be blamed for the violent actions taken by the kid audiences accidentally in real life.
Also
, I still think that the allocation of
time
for watching
TV
could impact the physical health among the children viewers. It is clear that allowing them to be glued on the
TV
screens is likely to lead to the sedentary lifestyle.
This
is one of the root cause of t
he l
Remove the article
apply
show examples
ess engagement in outdoor activities more useful to their health.
On the contrary
, the
time
control on
this
watching
time
can limit the bad consequence and even affect positively their emotions.
This
is because of the television programs become g
o
Add an article
a
show examples
od way of entertainment which helps the children relieve their mind and approach the healthy contents as mention above
Hence
, my opinion is that what the audiences see could have more impacts on them and the watching
time
must be planned with the aim of avoiding the bad consequences.
Submitted by Andy on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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