IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Some people believe that governments should ban dangerous sports even though others claim they should have the freedom to choose a sport to their liking. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

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Nowadays, some people claim that dangers sports should be restrained by governments while others are of the opinion that individuals should be free to pick their favourite sports.
This
 essay will be delved into both sides and
then
 will draw a conclusion.
To begin
 with, some state that the dangers sports are life- threaten and should be curbed by the government.
For instance
, there is a lot of evidence in news and media that show the increasing number of people who either lose their life or suffer from serious injuries due to skiing. Those who held the former opinion, believe that life is more precious than to pose it a danger for an enjoyable moment.
Therefore
, to secure society’s life, it is a governments responsibility to legislate some restriction on
such
 life-threatening activities.
On the other hand
, those who held the latter view, discuss that people should have the right to pick their preferred- sport. It is because,in case they do not have the right to opt for an activity, it is against the human-right.
Moreover
, if citizens cannot participate in their favourite activities, they will get depressed and will get more hurts compared to play extreme activities. As happiness is the key factor to have a well-being society government should not intrude citizens‘ freedom by strict rules. In conclusion,
although
 dangerous activities tend to put people in an unsafe situation, I believe that people should have the freedom to participate in their favourite activities under some restrictions which constitute being mature and healthy.
Submitted by mojgan on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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