IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Many museums charge for admission, while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admissions to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

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It has become more common for museums to charge an
entry
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fee
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 from visitors. From my perspective, the benefits of
this
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 practice outweigh the disadvantages. In the upcoming paragraphs, I will explain my viewpoint with relevant examples.
To begin
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 with, when museums charge a
fee
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 for access, they can offer better facilities to their visitors.
For example
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, they can hire more people to offer a warmer and more considerate service to tourists. They can hire more knowledgeable guides who can provide accurate information about the pieces on the display. They even can hire more security service for valuable items, monitoring of security systems and alarms.
In addition
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, they can invest in wheelchairs for differently enabled people. Obviously, there are clear benefits to charging an
entry
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fee
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.
Furthermore
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, the income from the sales of tickets is more stable than the donations received from sponsors. Museums that offer free admission depend entirely on the funds provided by the government.
Consequently
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, they even cannot maintain the museum properly.
This
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 actually leads to a fall in the number of visitors.
This
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 means even if
entry
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 is an expense, few people will want to visit the museums. Needless to say, the most famous museums in the world all charge a
fee
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 from travellers. In conclusion, there are more benefits than drawbacks to charging an
entry
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fee
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 for guests, the cost of visiting a museum will increase if there is an
entry
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 cost but most people will still be able to afford them.
Besides
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, museums can provide a better experience which will encourage more and more people to pay a visit.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural heritage
  • Preservation
  • Exclusionary
  • Revenue
  • Artifact
  • Maintenance
  • Engagement
  • Admission fee
  • Cultural enrichment
  • Sustainable funding
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