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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

more and more people tend to procrastinate in tasks these days. Some people think procrastination is the prime reason for the failure in life. Do you agree or disagree

#people #tasks #procrastination #reason #failure #life
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Traditionally, people recognized as successful are known for achieving goals in life. There are plenty of explanations
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 why people are not capable, nowadays,
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 accomplishing their own projects for their future.
Therefore
,a part of society believes that procrastination is the prime
reason
 for failure in life. I tend to agree with that since procrastination
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
is already an obstacle for itself to be overcome and reach productivity. Individuals
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 procrastinate often are not proactive enough to meet the standards of
this
 generation.
This
 workaholic society is currently developing,
updating
Correct word choice
and updating
show examples
 what is already a cutting-edge technology . For that
reason
, there is no space for people
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 are not able to meet deadlines efficiently. A good example of
that is
 the fact that big companies usually have a weekly schedule for every employee, and individuals
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 can not go
along with
 the calendar are usually dismissed. Procrastinators always prioritize entertainment activities
instead
 of
work
Change the verb form
working
show examples
 hard for an aim. With a simple gadget is possible to watch movies and
tv
Correct your spelling
TV
show examples
 shows or play games, which can easily be a distraction from studies.
Therefore
, if a person is not
interest
Wrong verb form
interested
show examples
 and
work
Replace the word
working
show examples
 or
study
Wrong verb form
studying
show examples
 hard will be difficult to find a well-paid job in
this
 highly competitive market. A good example of
that is
 the amount of working offers that require at least a
master
Change noun form
master's
show examples
 degree.
To sum up
, procrastination can be a considerable obstacle for a person to achieve goals in life. For that
reason
, even though is not the exclusive
reason
, still being one of the prime hindrances
from
Change preposition
to
show examples
 success.
Submitted by bia_inaciooliveira on

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task response
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion need more development and clarity. Make sure they relate to the rest of the essay.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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