Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time and have health problems as a result. Why do so many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem?

In the modern workplace, it has become very common that people have a lack of physical activities during the

day

as a result

, those people suffering from different medical issues and other diseases. Employers should be interested in having a healthy workforce;

therefore

, they should motivate their employees to do physical activities during the working

day

. Nowadays working lifestyle leads to health problems among

office

workers and other occupations that require to sit during the working

day

. Since most of the

office

workers do not have time for physical activities during the working

day

and in their free time either, their mussels become inactive and blood stop circulate properly.

Although

, in most of the companies it is not acceptable to move around the

office

during the

day

. From my own experience, in my previous position, I had allowed going to the toilet or for the lunch break only,

as a result

, I started to suffer from the back pain;

therefore

, I decided to leave

this

employer. Employees health condition vastly important, and

Add an article

the

show examples

mployer should consider it as a main priority. Since healthy employee could be much more profitable, companies should start to change their habits and provide some physical activities during the working

day

For example

, in my current

office

, we have yoga classes three times a week,

in addition

, our company provide subsidised gym membership. These kinds of activities

does

Change the verb form

show examples

not cost too much for the company, but for sure it improves employees health and motivation. In conclusion,

as a result

of busy work schedule and unhealthy work environments, most of the working people do not have enough time for physical activities;

therefore

, employers should provide some sports activities during the working

day

, to be able to keep their workforce in the good state.

Submitted by tatibek2 on Mon Dec 14 2020

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

295 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Time constraints
Sedentary lifestyle
Passive leisure activities
Workplace wellness programs
Active commuting
Subsidized
Public awareness
Health benefits
Incentivizing
Accessible public spaces

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Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time and have health problems as a result. Why do so many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

This drawing guides you through the steps for making freeze-dried coffee from start to finish. This is a linear process.

Schools should focus on academic success and passing examinations. Skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodwork should not be taught at school as it is better to learn these from family and friends. To that extent do you agree or disagree.

Countries should start using nuclear power as their main source of energy; fossil fuels (i.e. coal, oil and gas) are not going to last forever and nuclear power is the cheapest alternative. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In some areas of US, a "curfew" is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be outdoors after a particular time at night unless they are with an adult. what is your opinion about this?

As the number of private cars has increased, so too has the level of pollution in many cities. What can be done to tackle this increasingly common problem?