People after retirement often require financial assistance. Should the government be responsible for this or should the individuals make provisions for themselves? Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There have been various opinions regarding post-retirement
life
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
some argue that individuals should make preparations on their own, I maintain that the government should allocate funds to people after retirement as the monetary support is indispensable to maintain their long post-retirement lives without income. Some of the opinion that people should make preparations individually for their lives after retirement. The main reason is that
this
Linking Words
can allow people to freely make plans for their post-retirement
life
Use synonyms
. Building up their savings can enable them to maintain a high quality of
life
Use synonyms
using their abundant free time. The money saved up during their working years can enable them to spend money on their interests. Some enjoy their hobby
such
Linking Words
as travelling around the world with their family, leading to improvement in
r
Add an article
the
show examples
elationship with their partners.
This
Linking Words
can result in enhancing their post-retirement
life
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, I argue that providing financial support from the government is vital to maintain the basic lives of retired seniors. The main reason is that it can be impossible for those who receive low-income to cover expenditures throughout their post-retirement
life
Use synonyms
with only their preparations. Since people’s lifetime in many developed countries has been longer, their post-retirement
life
Use synonyms
can
last
Linking Words
for around twenty years. It costs a huge amount of money through increasing events related to health issues, including major surgeries or long-term nursing care services, imposing a significant financial burden. Many people can hardly maintain their long lives without the government’s funds. In conclusion, whereas some people say that individuals should prepare their post-retirement
life
Use synonyms
, I maintain that the government should be responsible for providing monetary supports to people after retirement.
This
Linking Words
is because retired
life
Use synonyms
can impose a significant financial burden, which can hardly cover with the provisions.
Submitted by aiko.miyazaki123 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial assistance
  • retirement
  • provisions
  • governmental pension plans
  • social security
  • welfare programs
  • financial literacy
  • private pensions
  • savings accounts
  • investments
  • economic stability
  • poverty line
  • safety net
  • personal responsibility
  • incentivizing
What to do next:
Look at other essays: