Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinions?

#people #music #cultures #ages

When it comes to joining different people,

music

is certainly an important option. In my opinion, different kinds of

music

and rhythms can have an important role in bringing people together no matter their age or customs.

This

essay will present arguments to support my thoughts.

First

, I believe that

music

has a strong power of uniting people all around the world.

This

is because rhythms and songs can provide some deep connection between listeners. According to some researchers, there is a recent theory which says that

music

is the universal language.

In other words

music

is the way that allows completely strange people to share the same emotions with each other.

Although

it is a theory yet, I truly believe

this

experience happens and,

for instance

, I have already felt

such

an experience when I listened to a jazz concert in New Orleans.

Second

, not only can

music

join different cultures, but

also

different ages.

For example

, there are some families with the same musical behaviour since previous generations. To illustrate, it is normal to see in some concerts of famous bands, grandparents, parents and sons together enjoying the performance.

This

is because

music

is not related to age, but to personal preferences,

therefore

, people in various phases of life can share the same interests. To sum up, I believe songs and rhythms have an important role in uniting people no matter their age or where they are from. Perhaps,

music

can be a way to make the world a better place.

Submitted by samirzakur on Sat Dec 19 2020

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

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‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

253 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinions?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Global warming is one of the various climate issues. Discuss the possible causes ad offer measures to control the damage caused.

Some people think that robots are very important for humans’ future development. Others, however, think that robots are a dangerous invention that could have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

Some people think the qualities a person needs to become successful in today's world cannot be learned at a university or similar academic institution.To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Genetic engineering is an important issue in society today. Some people think that it will improve people’s lives in many ways. Others feel that it may be a threat to life on earth. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.