These days some people spend a lot of money on tickets to go yo sporting or cultural events. Do you think it is a positive or negative development.

#people #money #tickets #yo #events #development

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Entertainment attractions like cultural events and sports games are becoming more popular over time. Some people spend a lot of money buying tickets for those attractions,

although

others think

this

attitude is unnecessary. I believe that entertainment events are always useful and should be encouraged, not only for the fun and socialization but for enhancing knowledge in different matters.

Firstly

, engaging in events is a fun activity for many people and can provide a moment of relaxation

that is

essential on the era that we are living right now.

For example

, going to a concert, a museum, or even a basketball match, is a moment where a person can dedicate time for themselves and have a relaxed and enjoyable occasion.

Furthermore

, events promote socialization skills, an ability

that is

essential for humans. When a person is relaxing in an event, their brains produce substances that can prevent some mental health conditions.

Consequently

, going to events is

also

a form of prevention for mental health diseases.

Moreover

, attractions like museums and other cultural events, are a great source for learning different subjects.

In addition

, these activities are most of the occasion enjoyable by the whole family, so it is a great opportunity to be together with children.

For instance

, museums are an excellent place for children to learn and socialize while they are having fun with the family.

Then

, caregivers should engage their kids to visit and have a knowledgeable adventure together. In conclusion, in my opinion, spending money to buy tickets to sports and cultural events is worth it. Because of the opportunity to relax and enjoy life,

in addition

to experiencing socialization and family moment, people should be encouraged to be part of these programs.

Moreover

, governments could even support

this

attitude by providing discounts for those in need.

Submitted by criszeno on Sun Dec 20 2020

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

300 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cultural phenomena
Economic stimulation
Live entertainment
Financial implications
Social benefits
Commercialization
Exclusionary pricing
Sustainability concerns
Cultural accessibility
Social experience
Extravagant spending
Civic engagement
Artistic patronage
Sports fanaticism

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