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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this

#countries #people #work #travel #year #school #university #studies
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Depending upon the requirement of students, the
education
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 system varies from country to country. Some countries prefer that after finishing high school, students should either
work
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 or
travel
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 for a
year
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 before joining university studies while others simply continue without a
gap
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year
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.
This
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gap
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year
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 system has its own merits and demerits which I will be discussing in the essay in
f
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the
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ollowing paragraphs.
First
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, let us discuss
about
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apply
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the merits for the young people who take a
gap
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year
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. I believe that
this
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 will give enough time to students to explore their areas of interest so that they can
enroll
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enrol
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 themselves in University
education
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 in a subject which they are passionate about.
Secondly
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, if these students choose for international
travel
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,
then
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 they will get a chance to learn about the different culture in the world. They will learn about new things which help them become more mature persons in their life.
Thirdly
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, those students, who will opt for
a
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apply
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work
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, will get a chance to earn money and save it for their University studies as
the
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apply
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higher
education
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 is very expensive in some countries. Despite all the positives associated, in my opinion, there are some demerits as well,
one
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 of the biggest
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draws
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draw back
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drawback
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 is that
travel
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 is not affordable for many students especially from
p
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the
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oor economic background.
Also
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,
instead
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 of a
gap
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year
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,
one
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 can continue higher studies, and later on
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,
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his/her carrier can go for a break when
one
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 has saved enough fund. You will be able to enjoy your
travel
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 more
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then
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than
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 as there will be no financial constraints.
Moreover
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, if
one
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 prefers to join a job, the quality of
work
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 you will get won’t be at par of your expectations. Many students end up working in a restaurant or taking up a menial job. That
work
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 experience may not add any value to
one
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’s resume. In the light of
a
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the
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bove arguments, it is up to the students how they want to pursue their
education
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. Some want to take a
gap
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 and relax, while
other
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others
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 would prefer to
enroll
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enrol
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to
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in
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 university
education
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. They should consider the merits and demerits before opting for any of the
option
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options
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.
However
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, I would opt for a
year
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gap
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, given the edge
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,
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I will get in finding my area of interest
Submitted by ktushir on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural immersion
  • Life experience
  • Work ethic
  • Career readiness
  • Self-discovery
  • Delayed gratification
  • Intellectual stagnation
  • Financial implications
  • Social dynamics
  • Academic trajectory
What to do next:
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