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Band 6.5

Many people living in cities these days do not get enough physical exercise. What are the causes of this?

#people #cities #exercise
Issues and trends related to subsistence in cities are frequently discussed these days.It is argued that a lack of physical activity has often happened with most people living in urban areas.In
this
 following paragraph, both causes and effects will be shown. On the one hand, there are several causes of a lot of people in the city have solely been getting physical exercise.The principal cause is that they do not have enough
time
.Many people have been living in an urban area for working and seeking jobs. To explain, they usually have focused on their works and have taken over
time
 in order to increase their salaries ;
thus
, they have decided to sit back and relax better than active exercise after their works. 
For example
,nowadays, people opt to watch Netflix for relaxing choices
instead
 of jogging in their free
time
. An additional point is that many cities have to tackle overpopulation issue.
In addition
, crowded people lead to many problems in a society ,
such
 as traffic congestion and air pollution as that would impact on the arrangement of living routine. Due to the problems, many people have to get up early to go to work for avoiding traffic jam ; and that they are too tired to go to the Gym at the end of the day.
For instance
, in Thailand, many people waste their
time
 more than 2 hours in transportation for leaving home, while people living in rural areas could walk for working and have more
time
 for exercising.
On the other hand
, the effect of
this
 has been and will continue to be significant serious. One of the possible effects is health problems. Generally, air pollution is the most problem happening in the cities that can result in healthy individuals ,
such
 as allergic and itchy.
Furthermore
, many people suffering from stress and overweight can
also
 result in fatigue symptom since they have been working too much. In conclusion,
although
 the lack of exercise in people who are living cities is a serious issue, there are many steps that governments and individuals take to reduce the effects
Submitted by musekusuma on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sedentary lifestyles
  • desk-bound jobs
  • fast-paced urban life
  • conveniences
  • physical exertion
  • barrier
  • densely populated
  • pollution
  • safety concerns
  • urban planning
  • pedestrian areas
  • cycle lanes
  • accessible
  • workplace wellness programs
  • subsidize
  • financial barriers
  • public awareness
  • incorporate
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