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Band 6

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#countries #consumers #supermarket #food #world #development
Today,
consumers
 can go to the supermarket and buy
food
 produced from all over the world, a common trend in many
countries
.
While
 some people think that
this
 is a positive development, bringing many benefits, I believe that
this
 development brings both opportunities and challenges
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and that measures need to be considered to optimize the benefits and minimize the negative impacts. First of all, buying global
food
 gives
consumers
 a variety of choices. They can access
products
 that were previously not available in their region, from tropical fruits,
typical
Correct word choice
and typical
show examples
 seafood to specialty dishes from other cultures.
This
 not only satisfies consumer needs but
also
 opens up opportunities for cultural exchange, as people can try dishes from faraway places.
For example
, in Vietnam, large supermarkets
such
 as Co.opmart or Big C have imported many types of
food
 from
countries
such
 as Japan, the US, and Australia, allowing
consumers
 to experience new dishes that they could previously only enjoy when
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
.
However
,
this
 development has
also
 caused significant consequences. One of the prominent problems is the negative impact on the environment. Transporting
food
 across borders requires a large amount of energy and causes greenhouse gas emissions, contributing to climate change.
In addition
, the increase in imported
products
 can reduce the incentive for domestic agricultural
products
, causing domestic
products
 to lose value and become less competitive in terms of price.
In addition
, uncontrolled
food
 imports can lead to
food
 safety problems.
Although
countries
 have different quality standards, not all imported
products
 always meet
food
 hygiene and safety requirements.
For example
, the use of chemicals in
food
 production in some
countries
 can affect the health of
consumers
. In short, the ability of
consumers
 to buy global
food
 brings many benefits, but there are
also
 many problems that need to be solved. Governments and regulatory agencies need to have strict control policies to ensure product quality and minimize negative impacts on the environment. At the same time,
consumers
also
 need to raise awareness in choosing
products
, prioritizing safe
products
 and protecting the long-term interests of the community and the environment.
Submitted by jakelong16091994 on

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task achievement
Include more specific examples to support your main points. While you did provide some examples, such as the supermarkets in Vietnam, they could be more detailed to offer additional depth.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Consider using transitional phrases or words to enhance the flow of ideas.
coherence cohesion
Good introduction and conclusion that effectively summarise your main points.
task achievement
The essay addresses both positive and negative aspects of the development, showing a balanced view.
task achievement
Each main point is clearly explained, providing a well-rounded argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Get your IELTS Essential Vocabulary List —
Topic Vocabulary:
  • nutrition
  • cultural exposure
  • competitive markets
  • economic boost
  • employment opportunities
  • carbon footprint
  • environmental impact
  • local produce
  • food security
  • global supply chain
  • sustainable practices
  • consumer choice
  • market dynamics
  • price competition
  • agricultural sector
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