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Writing Samples
Band 7

Professional workers like doctors, nurses and teachers make a greater contribution to society and so should be paid more than sports and entertainment personalities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#workers #doctors #nurses #teachers #contribution #society #sports #entertainment #personalities
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In the present world, some sports stars and idols can earn abnormal income, while some
society
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 contributors ,
such
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 as hospital workers and educators, gain much lower salaries. Under
this
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 circumstance, some
people
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 believe that
people
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 with greater devotion to the country should own a greater wage. From my perspective, I tend to agree that professional workers should be pay more, but not necessarily higher than sports and celebrities. The following essay will prove my statement by analyzing why professional
people
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 should be paid more but not a must to surpass the income of celebrities. On the one hand,
society
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 improvement is mostly based on the endeavour of professional workers,
such
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 as the constructive devotion from scientists and teachers, and other industrial talents. Economists,
for example
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, help the government to set fiscal, monetary and financial policies which provide
people
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 with a better consumption environment and living standards.
However
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, it is miserable that those
people
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 who work for the whole
society
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 and citizens have less income than that of entertainment personalities.
As a result
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, the
next
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 generation might tend to become actors or other positions of the same kind,
instead
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 of those works that make practical benefits to the country advancement but earn little! .
However
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, even though
people
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 who are working in a critical position should earn more money, those who are trying hard to make
people
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’s life become more interesting
also
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 deserve a better reward. Lebron James,
for instance
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, have millions of fans in the global range. It means that his fans are more likely to purchase endorsement products, while his excellent performance in the competitions
also
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 can give incentives and build a role model for teenagers.
Consequently
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, its commercial value can create numerous job opportunities, which is
also
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 a contribution to the country. In conclusion, both
people
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 working in a crucial position or simply play an entertaining role in
people
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’s life dedicate hugely to the whole
society
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. We need to advocate for both kinds of earnings to be worthy as they deserve. By doing so, it would not only benefit
i
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an
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ndividual’s development but
also
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 good for social construction.
Submitted by Esther on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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