It is generally accepted that exercise is good for children and teenagers. Therefore, physical education and sport should be compulsory for all students in all schools. What do you think?

Several learning
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centres

The spelling of centers is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

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centers
don't include sports in their
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curriculum

The word cirrculum is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

cirrculum
. Considering the benefits of physical activity, I strongly believe that
this
subject has to be made mandatory in schools for students of all grades. In
this
essay, I will emphasize
Verify preposition usage
apply

It appears that the preposition on may be unnecessary in this context. Consider removing it.

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on
the advantages that support my argument. WHO says "90% of the obese
people
are lazy and move very little". Physical training helps young
people
in building the right fitness level.
In other words
, any form of
Correct your spelling
activities

The word acitivies is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

acitivies
such
as aerobics, karate and games are
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necessary

The word neccessary is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

neccessary
for our body to maintain good
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health

The word healthy doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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healthy
and shape.
For example
,
people
who play cricket in colleges are more active and fit compared to others who restrict themselves to classrooms. If educational
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institutions

The word insitutions is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

insitutions
don't encourage sports, children will
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adapt

The word adopt doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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adopt
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apply

It appears that the preposition to may be unnecessary in this context. Consider removing it.

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to
a sedentary lifestyle at an early age.
In addition
, exercises improve overall
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cardiovascular

The word cardio vascular seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

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cardio vascular
strength. It is widely believed that
people
from defence forces are highly disciplined compared to others.
This
is because
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apply

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,
they undergo rigorous training which keeps them active and
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cultivates

The plural verb cultivate does not appear to agree with the singular subject rigorous training. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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cultivate
good manners.
Similarly
, kids can develop discipline when they are made to participate in physical activities.
For instance
, army men are made to wake up daily at 5 a.m. for workouts. Due to
this
, they find adequate time for other productive works. In conclusion, sports should have an equal priority along with the
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other

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others
subjects that are taught in schools and colleges. Certainly,
such
practices contribute to the overall development of
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apply

It appears that the is unnecessary in this context. Consider removing it.

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the
young leaners.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Read more in the eBook

The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »

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