IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

It is wiser to use your money to gain meaningful experiences than to use it to acquire possessions. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#money #gain #experiences #possessions
Many people like buying tangible assets like expensive mobile phones, cars, or other electronic items. No doubt, a few of these are necessities for someone, while for others, it’s a way of portraying their status to the outside world. I would argue that
such
 possessions might not have any long term impact.
However
, getting experience with the extra
money
 is always better for the individual to grow. It’s always better to invest extra
money
 in new
experiences
 rather than investing in a tangible asset, as
experiences
 would be the ones we would be able to cherish whenever we remember them.
For example
, buying an expensive car or using the same funds to sponsor a trip to Vancouver. The trip would be more valuable in the long run as we would remember it for our lifetime.
On the other hand
, a car depreciates its value every year, and after some point, it will stop working. For many of us,
experiences
also
 help us grow as an individual and get more exposure. During the summer holidays, we can stay at home, going out to movies and parties.
However
, if I plan a trip to the Netherlands, I would be putting myself out of my comfort zone where there is a language barrier. I will get an idea of surviving under
such
 circumstances, which will eventually help me broaden my perspective of different cultural values across the world.
Although
,
money
 saved is
money
 earned. It’s not wise to have experienced while taking loans or borrowing for your marriage and going beyond your planned spending. Any extra
money
 is always better putting in
experiences
 which eventually would make us grow in the long run.
Submitted by Shubham Trivedi on

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    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
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