IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Too much money is spent in maintaining and repairing old buildings, some people think they should be knocked down and give way to modern building. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#money #buildings #people
Nowadays we have a big amount of old
buildings
 need to be maintaining and repairing. Some people think those building should be replaced by the modern building.
However
, I believe some
buildings
 need to be rebuild, but most of the old
buildings
 should not give up. On the one hand, with the urbanization process, the city rapidly expanded the built-up area in a very short period of time, some
buildings
 in the city centre have no time to removed.
For example
, the urban villages in Guangzhou city are surrounded by rising skyscrapers, associated with squalor, overcrowding and social problems. Those building should be replaced by modern
buildings
.
On the other hand
, it is undoubted that the ancient
buildings
 contribute essential roles for historical span. These households are milestones for the human to rewind memorable timelines for their ancestors. Money,
as a result
, is aimed to invest to repair and protect these historical values.
For instance
, Notre Dame de Paris, which is one of the most favourable tourist attractions in the world. It,
therefore
, should be maintained to protect the culture.
Moreover
, people are more likely to be attracted to ancient
buildings
,
thus
, these
buildings
 should make a significantly huge amount of money for the social foundation. In conclusion, ancient
buildings
 should be protected by time while there are still many ways to construct modern households. I personally disagree with the topic ideas through the mentioned reasons.
Submitted by junyimen on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: