Some people believe that personal happiness is directly related to economic success, others believe that there are other factors. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

this

modernised world , certain group of people are in search of well-being where as another section is wandering for money.

This

is where the question : " whether money could buy pleasure ?" arises . Some people states that joy is directly proportional to our financial status whereas others points out the existence of other elements in delight . In my opinion , several other ingredients are added inorder to have a happy soul .

This

essay discusses both the aspects and explain my opinion on behalf .

To begin

with , if a person is rich , he could enjoy every luxuries in his life .

Hence

, for many individuals fund is the criteria to be joyful. They emphasize on the fact that finance could buy everything they wish , which can fullfill their satisfaction that indeed results in inner joy and peace . On the flip side , opposites claim that

besides

monetary capitals , funds and properties , two more additives are needed to turn our lives jubilent : satisfaction and family .

For instance

, a wealthy man can feel lonely if no-one is there to share his ups and downs , thereby he will become unhappy and will not be able to enjoy his life . But a poor fellow can find contentment in himself when his family is there to share his emotions being a backbone throughout his journey.

Moreover

, satisfaction is another piece of paper in the book of an elated person . To exemplify , a poor street hawker can be happy just like a business tycoon if he is satisfied with whatever he has. He do not have a greedy mind which craves for more luxuries in his life and even don't have a depressed soul which blames for his darker sides . To sum up , being happy is a mixture of factors where economic wealth is only a minor one among many . Even if

this

particular sector is absent, one can find bliss in a lot more ways .

Therefore

, being well-to-do and euphoria are two different words which have nothing much to do when it's put together .

Submitted by aanetthomas03 on Thu Feb 11 2021

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

364 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

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Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

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