IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

prevention is better than cure. Reseaching and treating disease is always costly so it would be better to invest in the preventative measure. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

#prevention #cure #disease #measure
Investment in precautions always thought to be the best way of saving huge
money
 which has been invested in treating and researching any diseases as it says “Prevention is better than Cure”. I completely agree with
this
 saying and
this
 essay will analyze my point below.
Firstly
, it has always been expensive to treat any new ailment due to the fact it required huge resources and time which could wisely
invested
Change the verb form
be invested
invest
show examples
 in preventing measures. Every nation every year hire many scientists to work on new diseases so they can set
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
 record in
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
medicine
Replace the word
medical
show examples
 history. But without them knowing some minor illness can simply be treated by taking some preventions. To illustrate that, in 2019 companies all around the globe invested enormous
money
 just to come
first
 in the COVID-19 vaccination race. Undoubtedly, preventions
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 one of the effective methods in some cases because it makes people aware and
trigger
Change the verb form
triggers
show examples
 the danger before it takes place. Traditionally, people believe in taking precautions rather than depending on the medicines which
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 even useful in some situations like if you have cold or pain in
body
Add an article
the body
show examples
 it is suggested to drink ginger tea or rest at home and simply doing that people not only saving
money
 but
also
 their health from taking scientific tablets. To Conclude, investing in treating disease not only cost us
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
time but
also
money
 too. It has been recommended that
taking
Change preposition
by taking
show examples
 some significant cure steps we could easily save our health and recourses.
Therefore
, I personally
too
Replace the word
to
show examples
 have faith in precautions rather than depending so much on medicines.
Submitted by luckydeep70 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: