The world has many towns and cities constructed in previous centuries that were suitable and livable for people in those times. What problems will these ancient towns cause today? And what should be done to deal with that?

#world #towns #cities #centuries #people #times

It is true that many

towns

and cities built in old ages for our ancestors exist in the modern world. These historical

towns

cause several problems and methods should be taken to solve them.

Towns

with a long history have led to a few troubles.

Firstly

, houses might corrupt and be dangerous since walls and other materials might not be stable after a long period. It is likely that electric wires can not afford the huge burden brought by so many domestic machines like air conditioners and refrigerators.

Secondly

, roads might not be wide enough for vehicles to pass through, because they might be constructed for pedestrians and horses. It is inconvenient for dwellers living there to move around.

Thirdly

, there might be little space for recreation and

infrastructures

Fix the agreement mistake

infrastructure

show examples

, especially those places used

Change preposition

for

show examples

the city centre. Inhabitants and governments should carry out solutions to these problems.

To begin

, citizens living in the houseware are supposed to examine it thoroughly . Once a crack

Change preposition

show examples

the wall is found, they should repair it. Electric facilities should be renewed to make it a safe place.

Besides

, it is the authorities' duty to get cities

well planned

Add a hyphen

well-planned

show examples

. On the one hand, they might relocate some citizens to make room for roads and leisure areas.

On the other hand

, they might preserve the original appearance of

towns

and turn it into a historical site. In conclusion, the existence of old

towns

and cities

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

caused ample problems which require the efforts of individuals and governments. Repair,

renew

Wrong verb form

renewing

show examples

and

rebuild

Wrong verb form

rebuilding

show examples

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

necessary under different circumstances.

Submitted by 626601064 on Tue Feb 16 2021

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Task Response

Overall, your essay is well-structured and addresses the given topic. You have provided good examples to support your points.

Coherence and Cohesion

To improve coherence and cohesion, work on creating smoother transitions between ideas. Additionally, consider using more linking words to connect your sentences and paragraphs effectively.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

261 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

overcrowding
infrastructure
traffic congestion
housing shortages
degradation
cultural heritage
energy efficiency
carbon footprint
accessibility
sustainable urban planning
smart city technologies
green technology
regulations
sustainable
integrated
public transportation
pedestrian
cycling infrastructure
reliance
mitigate

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The world has many towns and cities constructed in previous centuries that were suitable and livable for people in those times. What problems will these ancient towns cause today? And what should be done to deal with that?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that water is the most important natural resource. Others believe that other resources (such as oil and gold) are more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that children should have activities organised for them, while others believe that they should be free to do what they want in their free time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people say early education is important in a child’s life while others say spending time with family is more vital. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Some think scientists should be allowed to send messages into space to communicate with other life forms while others believe this is too dangerous. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.