In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decided to do this.

Adolescents in many
countries
are promoted to work and travel for one
year
after high
school
graduation.
This
trend is popular in western
countries
nowaday
Correct your spelling
nowadays
show examples
. It is a tendency to believe that young
people
who took a
gap
year
before
start
Change the form of the verb
starting
show examples
their
university
may have
wide
Add an article
a wide
show examples
perspective and know the exact point of their future
life
.
However
, some
people
may think that
this
aspect may waste the time rather than go straight
in to
Join the words
into
show examples
university
after finishing high
school
. According to
this
point of view, there are many western
Correct your spelling
children's
children
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
wandering to other
countries
after they are graduated
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
high
school
to work and travel. Some young
people
believe that work and travel before enrolled
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
university
will make them gain more experience
also
know what they want to be in the future.
For example
, living
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
their own without asking
money
Change preposition
for money
show examples
from
parent
Add an article
a parent
the parent
show examples
will make them realise how to deal with the money in their
life
.
This
point
lead
Change the verb form
leads
show examples
the better monetizing management and experiences from working. Pinpointing at travelling to
others
Replace the word
other
show examples
countries
can open their perspective in different cultures as well. The advantages of
gap
Add an article
a gap
show examples
year
are
actual
Change the adjective
actually
show examples
seen that the
children
who have more experience in
life
may prompt to start their lives in
university
better than others.
However
, some
people
believes
Change the verb form
believe
show examples
that the
gap
year
after high
school
is wasted.
For instance
, Asians
children
mostly straightforward from high
school
to
university
so they can finish degrees and start their own lives faster. They think that the experiences can receive after they have their certain jobs and money.
This
is why some
people
think that the disadvantages of having a
gap
year
may waste the time of monetizing and having a quality job. They might lose their chances to apply to a good position in
university
because when the time
pass
Change the verb form
passes
show examples
by, there are more intelligence juniors to challenge your position in the major faculties that you want to apply
.
Change preposition
to.
show examples
In conclusion,
There
Correct your spelling
there
show examples
are several
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
benefits and drawbacks of
gap
Add an article
a gap
show examples
year
in high
school
children
. I strongly agree that it would be better for
children
to take a
year
leave before
start
Change the verb form
starting
show examples
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
university
to fulfil the
life
experience and guide the future
life
in the happiness way
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural immersion
  • Life experience
  • Work ethic
  • Career readiness
  • Self-discovery
  • Delayed gratification
  • Intellectual stagnation
  • Financial implications
  • Social dynamics
  • Academic trajectory
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