IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Human activity has had a negative impact on plants and animals around the world. Some people say that it is too late to do something while others think that actions can be taken to improve the situation. Discuss both sides of the view and give your opinion

#activity #impact #plants #animals #world #people #actions #situation
Forest and
animals
 play a vital role in the life of every individual because vegetation provide
us
Verify preposition usage
withus
show examples
 oxygen and creatures make the balance of
food
Correct article usage
the food
show examples
 cycle.
However
,a handful of masses opine that human activity has had a bad influence on flora and
animals
 that cannot
be
Change the verb form
be changed
show examples
change
Correct your spelling
changed
show examples
.In my opinion,it can
be
Change the verb form
be changed
show examples
change
Correct your spelling
changed
show examples
 if the government should take any action against these activities.
To begin
 with,deforestation is the
first
 factors that harmful impact on plants and
animals
 because
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 is emerging day by day
Although
,the need
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 land is more so that’s why individuals are cutting down
forest
Add an article
the forest
show examples
 for their livelihood.
Secondly
, there are many Masses those who are doing hunting of wild
animals
 For the enjoyment as well as for the source of food.
Moreover
, the skin of
animals
 is used for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
medicine and clothes.
For instance
,one writer wrote in his survey that
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
all over the world 10,000 creatures were killed for
medicine
Replace the word
medicinal
show examples
 purposes and for the entertainment of individuals.
On the other hand
, there are ample
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
way to stop deforestation like every person take
oath
Add an article
an oath
show examples
 that they would plant one tree every month which will
helpful
Replace the word
help
show examples
 to observe the
green house
Correct your spelling
greenhouse
show examples
 gases which are enhancing due to global warming.
Furthermore
, the government should ban
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
hunting and allow
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
pharmaceutical companies to use only dead
animals
 rather than living creatures. To conclude, the government should impose
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
show examples
 fine and punishment on hunting as well as on cutting
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
plants.
Submitted by rajeev kumar on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: