One of the consequences of the improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expentancy is increasing. Do yo think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#consequences #care #people #life #expentancy #yo #development

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The more country is developed the more medical care is being improved.

Consequently

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, society is able to live longer. The consequences of increasing life expectancy can be easily observed. There are

people

Use synonyms

who claim that it has positive impacts,

however

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, there are

also

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those, who believe that disadvantages outweigh the advantages. ,

Personally

Add a comma

,Personally

show examples

I agree more with the

second

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group. It can be observed, those highly-developed countries are the ones with outweigh of elderly

people

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. It is caused by the medical care and social benefits that are provided for citizens. It means that elderly

people

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are able to live in proper conditions and have a wealthy life.

However

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, the higher percentage of society is older, the more money for them are needed to be provided. Not only for health

Remove the comma

apply

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but

also

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for education.

Moreover

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, if more

people

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were on retirement than in work, there would be a lack of employees.

Therefore

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, there wouldn't be enough doctors and social workers, willing to help older one's. Due to that, the government has to provide rents from its' own pocket.

Therefore

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, the treasury will tighten and salaries can drop.

Furthermore

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, those in need would find themselves in a horrible situation. Most of them would have to come back to work, despite the age. Giving all that under the consideration, it can be seen that life expectancy have many disadvantages.

Moreover

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, the country that has found itself in

this

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situation has to be clever, encourage the young generation to procreate and prepared for spending a large amount of money.

Submitted by laura on Tue Mar 02 2021

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

254 words

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One of the consequences of the improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expentancy is increasing. Do yo think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

some people believe that everyone has a right to have access to university education and that governments should make it free for all students no matter what financial background they have. To what extent do you agree or disagree ? Nhi

Million of dollars are spent on space research every year. Some people argue that the money should be spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disagree?

Mobile phone and the internet could have many benefits for old people. However, this age group uses technology the least. What are the benefits for old people of using mobile phones and the internet? How can we encourage them to use this new technology?

Some people think that marketing and advertising is useless because people buy their products from some shops which have good quality of services and products. Do you agree or disagree?