In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, the
life
Use synonyms
expectancy of an individual is gradually increasing. Many
people
Use synonyms
believe that
this
Linking Words
trend is a positive development;
on the
Linking Words
contrary
Add a comma
,contrary
show examples
it can cause several various
problems
Use synonyms
for
lifestyle
Add an article
the lifestyle
a lifestyle
show examples
of
people
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
essay will emphasize some main
problems
Use synonyms
and proposes some possible solutions to decrease the negative impact caused by elderly
people
Use synonyms
. One of the
first
Linking Words
problems
Use synonyms
is the cost of living after
retirement
Use synonyms
age
Use synonyms
. Due to
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the high
life
Use synonyms
expectancy,
people
Use synonyms
will spend as much time in
retirement
Use synonyms
as they have worked.
For instance
Linking Words
, if a person retired at
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
60 and will live another 40 years receiving a
retirement
Use synonyms
for a long time,
this
Linking Words
will significantly effect on
quality
Add an article
the quality
show examples
of
life
Use synonyms
of retirees. The most positive solution to
current
Add an article
the current
show examples
problem is to raise the
retirement
Use synonyms
age
Use synonyms
by a certain
years
Correct the article-noun agreement
year
show examples
.
In addition
Linking Words
, it will rehabilitate the situation and help the elderly to collect the necessary amount of money for a comfortable old
age
Use synonyms
. Today, the problem of unemployment is the most urgent.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the increase in the
retirement
Use synonyms
age
Use synonyms
can
also
Linking Words
impact
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
issue. It may
leads
Change the verb form
lead
show examples
that the younger generation will suffer from a lack of jobs. To avoid
this
Linking Words
problem government needs to start
invest
Change the form of the verb
investing
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
new spheres of technology.
As a result
Linking Words
,
state
Add an article
the state
show examples
will open new workplaces, which reduce unemployment. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
increasing
life
Use synonyms
expectancy leads
a
Change preposition
to a
show examples
variety of
problems
Use synonyms
,
such
Linking Words
as unemployment and cost of living, these issues are surmountable. In my view, it is the government’s responsibility to tackle these concerns, and they should begin by considering some solutions proposed above.
Submitted by badilkha on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • average life expectancy
  • developed world
  • increase
  • individuals
  • society
  • personal goals
  • ambitions
  • quality of life
  • leisure
  • recreation
  • healthcare costs
  • challenges
  • healthcare system
  • ageing population
  • shortage
  • available workers
  • economy
  • retirement planning
  • healthy lifestyles
  • investing
  • social support systems
What to do next:
Look at other essays: