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Band 4

Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private life? Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #media #privacy #price #fame #invasion #life
At present time, some
people
 believe that the Renowned personalities should be treated equitably by the media in our country wheres
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
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 argues that it is a disadvantage of being well-known that citizens are interested in knowing about their personal existence.
firstly
, In my opinion, famous individuals are like
the
Remove the article
apply
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other
people
 in our country only. They should be behaved in the same way as others by the TV channel industries and should not enter into their private life-style.
For
instance
Add a comma
,instance
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 there were times when some of the distinguished
people
 got angry during the press-conference by asking about personal and not
relevent
Correct your spelling
relevant
quesitons
Correct your spelling
questions
. There are many youths of our nation who follow their role-models and get inspired by following their favourite actor/actress, as a
results
Correct the article-noun agreement
result
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 it motivates the younger generation of our society as well as play a vital role in
development
Add an article
the development
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 of our communities. For
an
Correct article usage
apply
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example the actor Ranveer Singh today is known by
entire
Add an article
the entire
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 world was an enormous follower of Akshay Kumar.
On the other hand
, being
a
Change the article
apply
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famous is sometimes comes with a price to pay as they are getting captured by the live multi-media of our homeland on
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 daily basis because
people
 of our county are much interested in
knowning
Correct your spelling
knowing
 about their daily routines and life issues and facts ,
consequently
Add a comma
,consequently
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 they have to face the repercussion of being a well-known member of the nation. In conclusion,
although
 the media-channels at present time handles
the
Correct article usage
apply
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famous personalities unfairly
moreover
 it is a result of their occupations that the county
people
 are getting to know about their
individuals
Change to a genitive case
individual's
individuals'
show examples
 way of living.
Submitted by gupta020295 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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