IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

There are a variety of different perspectives on whether or not
governments
Use synonyms
 should spend money on railways
instead
Linking Words
 of roads. In my personal opinion, I believe
governments
Use synonyms
 spending money on railways is a better decision than on roads and my reasons are below.
Firstly
Linking Words
, investing in railways can significantly reduce carbon emissions. Global temperatures are rising, the main reason is that
people
Use synonyms
 tend to drive
cars
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 rather than take public transportation, if
governments
Use synonyms
 develop efficient public transport systems,
people
Use synonyms
 will be more willing to use them. Developing
Use synonyms
railway
Correct article usage
a railway
show examples
system
Use synonyms
 not only can reduce carbon emissions but
also
Linking Words
creates
Correct subject-verb agreement
create
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 more job opportunities. Meanwhile, the
railway
Use synonyms
system
Use synonyms
 could reduce traffic jams. If
people
Use synonyms
 take trains and subways more often than driving
cars
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, the number of
cars
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 on streets and highways will decline.
Therefore
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,
people
Use synonyms
 will not be stuck on the road for hours.
Furthermore
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, the
railway
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system
Use synonyms
 can transport a higher number of passengers than
cars
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, and
also
Linking Words
 offers higher speeds and covers longer distances.
For example
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, whenever I visit Taipei, I choose to use the MRT
system
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
 of driving.
This
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 is because Taipei has bad traffic jams, and the MRT is very convenient. It can take me anywhere in the city easily.
Due to
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 the MRT
system
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’s well-designed,
that
Correct word choice
apply
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it's always my first choice for getting around Taipei. In conclusion, I believe
governments
Use synonyms
 should support
railway
Use synonyms
 development for several reasons, one, declining carbon emissions is good for
global
Add an article
the global
a global
show examples
 environment, two, it can provide job vacancies,
three
Correct word choice
and three
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, public transportation is more efficient and reliable.
Base
Wrong verb form
Based
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 on these reasons, supporting
Use synonyms
railway
Correct article usage
the railway
show examples
 not only benefits
people
Use synonyms
 but
also
Linking Words
 benefits the environment.

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task achievement
Try to further elaborate on each point with more specific details or research evidence to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your sentence structures vary more. Occasionally, the sentences feel repetitive in their structure.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and well-defined structure, making it easy to follow.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-crafted and provide a firm framework for your discussion.
task achievement
The arguments you present are relevant and supported to some extent by specific examples.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Carbon emissions
  • Mass transportation
  • Traffic congestion
  • Economic growth
  • Regional development
  • Initial investment
  • Feasibility
  • Flexibility
  • Rural areas
  • Integration
  • Sustainable
  • Efficiency
  • Infrastructure
  • Commuters
  • Public expenditure
  • Autonomous vehicles
  • Long-term investment
  • Accessibility
  • Connectivity
  • Modal shift
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