Many countries are spending a huge amount of money on supporting their competitors to take part in some worldwide sports competitions. Others argue that it would be better if these countries can spend the money on children to take part in sports. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There are
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
of countries in the world
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
are using
great
Add an article
a great
show examples
amount of
money
on advertisements
of
Verify preposition usage
for
show examples
their teams. I agree that they should start spending
money
on
children
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
activities in that way they will start the encouragement of early stages in their life towards
games
. to start with
childres
Correct your spelling
children
children's
sports ,
children
now a days
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
are spending more amount
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
time in online
games
rather than offline
games
.
this
is
effecting
Correct your spelling
affecting
show examples
their
heath
Correct your spelling
health
show examples
coinditions
Correct your spelling
conditions
also
. in order to overcome
this
one
countries
Change to a singular noun
country
show examples
should start using
money
on
childern
Correct your spelling
children
children's
sports activities . take an example of china , using
money
on
children
at an early for their sporting
activites
Correct your spelling
activities
.
this
is very useful in childhood
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because so many of them are deciding their future goals at an early age, like participating in some
games
such
as swimming,running,cricket and many more to list out.
on the other
hand
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,hand
show examples
many nations spend their most economy on people who are representing their country worldwide.it is good
upto
Correct your spelling
up to
to
some extent , when they achieve something it would bring fame to the nation.but some are misusing it by promoting some advertisements.
this
may lead to some dissatisfaction among some people around the world.take an example of some favourite player giving
suggestion
Add an article
the suggestion
a suggestion
show examples
of using some worst brand for its usage.everyone is benefited from them except the users who used showed some
disaggrement
Correct your spelling
disagreement
. in conclusion,
government
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the government
show examples
should start spending their amount on
children
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
activities when compared with other thing named spending
money
on
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
competitors.because if we spend
money
on the
first
purpose it would bring
great
Add an article
a great
show examples
future to the
Correct your spelling
child
child's
childs
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
.
Submitted by manojdivi295 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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