IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Many people chose to work or travel for a year before college to what extent do you agree or disagree

#people #work #travel #year #college
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
As the education system is now more hectic and stressful and expensive
therefore
Linking Words
, many youths chose to do work to meet their
college
Use synonyms
 expensive or go for some outing for chilling before
college
Use synonyms
 start. For me, I do agree with
this
Linking Words
 and, I do recommend people to take a break of the
year
Use synonyms
 after the schooling and chill out for a bit to doing something if they are interested in working can do a job. 
College
Use synonyms
 is the
next
Linking Words
 step of your life and it is the moment in your life when you decide what you want to be in your future and for that youngster do take a break of a
year
Use synonyms
 in that some pupil chose for working so that they can meet their academic need and some people go for travelling with their family or by themselves so that they can refresh themselves before the university started.
For example
Linking Words
: when I was about to enter
college
Use synonyms
 I took a one
year
Use synonyms
 drop because at that time I was so confused I didn't know what should I have
chose
Change the verb form
chosen
show examples
 because all my future depended on that
at
Add the comma(s)
, at last,
show examples
last
Linking Words
 I came to
this
Linking Words
 conclusion that will take a break for some time and I drop my one
year
Use synonyms
 and went for a trip in the north part of India.  As per me, I do agree people do consider taking a
year
Use synonyms
 drop after their school. And in that
year
Use synonyms
 they can do whatever they want either they can work or can go for outing with family or friends or alone. And make up their mind what they want to chose
next
Linking Words
 as entering the academy is life-changing for them because whatever they will do their future will depend
ondepend
Correct your spelling
on depend
depend
 on that.  Overall in short summary taking a
year
Use synonyms
 gap between the school and
college
Use synonyms
 is a great idea as entering the university is going to change everything and fir
this
Linking Words
 mentally prepared is good
Submitted by Sandeep mistry on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: