some people think that environmental problems should be solved on a global scale while others believe it is better to deal with them nationally. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

The growing concern
of
Change preposition
about
show examples
environmental challenges has sparked
argument
Fix the agreement mistake
arguments
show examples
of
Change preposition
about
show examples
how they should be solved by different nations.
While
some people advocate a global approach, others think each
national
Replace the word
nation
show examples
should find solutions by itself. In my opinion,
to tackle
Change the verb form
tackling
show examples
environmental challenges,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
requires both global and national efforts. The main reason to ask for
global
Correct article usage
a global
show examples
approach is that environmental problems are so complex that international
coorporations
Correct your spelling
corporations
cooperation
and consensus are needed. It has been agreed that one major challenge we are facing today is global warming and that
controling
Correct your spelling
controlling
carbon emissions is the key to
solve
Wrong verb form
solving
show examples
this
problem. To do so, it will require all countries' participation, regardless of their incomes and industrialization levels.
That is
why some international
agreement
Fix the agreement mistake
agreements
show examples
,
such
as the Paris Agreement and Kyoto
Protocals
Correct your spelling
Protocol
were put in place to set a global target of reducing greenhouse emissions.
On the other hand
, each nation should set its own priority
according to
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
own
situations
Fix the agreement mistake
situation
show examples
.
For instance
, some countries, like Brazil, have extensive coverage of wild forest that absorbs carbon dioxide and provides habitats for thousands of
wildlives
Correct your spelling
wildfires
wild lives
wildlife
. Naturally, the first priority for these nations will be preventing deforestation and preserving the local ecosystem.
By contrast
, other states
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
do not own
such
amount of forests but use coal as their main energy source. Coal, as a fossil fuel, is a big polluter and
eimit
Correct your spelling
emits
large
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
show examples
of carbon dioxide.
Therefore
, for these
coutnries
Correct your spelling
countries
, they should focus more on curbing
usage
Correct article usage
the usage
show examples
of fossil fuels and finding
ecofriendly
Correct your spelling
eco-friendly
show examples
alternatives
instead
of protecting forests.
To conclude
, combatting environmental
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
is a large and
various
Replace the word
varied
show examples
topic.
While
international collaboration can help to negotiate a common goal and push consensus, each state should
also
act
according to
its own context.
Submitted by henggu on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
The essay provides a clear response to the task question and discusses both sides of the argument effectively. The position is clearly stated in the introduction and supported throughout the essay. Well done!
coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates a good logical structure, with clear introduction and conclusion present. The ideas are presented in a coherent order, and the use of linking words helps to connect the ideas effectively. However, there could be a more explicit use of cohesive devices to further enhance the coherence of the essay.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • international cooperation
  • sovereign rights
  • Paris Agreement
  • climate change
  • ocean pollution
  • collective measures
  • economic interests
  • political will
  • enforcement issues
  • free-riders
  • tailor-made solutions
  • transboundary pollution
  • resource constraints
  • global frameworks
  • national efforts
What to do next:
Look at other essays: