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Writing Samples
Band 5

One of the most important issues facing the world today is a shortage of food and some think genetically modified foods are a possible solution. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#world #shortage #food #think #foods
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The shortage of
food
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 is one of the most important issues nowadays; some people think genetically modified
foods
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 are
plausible
Correct article usage
a plausible
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 solution. It is indisputable that the
resources
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 of
food
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are now become
Change to the active voice
now become
have now become
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 scarce; thereby, the
advance
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advanced
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 technology brings
the
Correct article usage
apply
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GMO
food
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 to solve
this
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problem
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.
However
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, I believed that
the
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apply
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organic
food
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 is the best for human health.
In
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To
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 some extent of the
problem
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, human beings are omnivores because people eat plants, cooked meats and fish. According to the overpopulation of human, there are overwhelmed of
food
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 companies that hunting the natural
food
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resources
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.
Moreover
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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environmental issues
such
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 as global warming and
water
Add a hyphen
water-scarce
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scarce
Replace the word
scarcity
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also
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 affect the agriculture system; it can
reduces
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reduce
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 the quality of crops and causes disease in farm animals.
Therefore
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, there are many technologies in
food
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resources
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 that will improve the quality of diets, particularly in genetically modified
foods
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.
On the other hand
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, an investigation shows that consumption of these genetically engineered
foods
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 can cause the development of diseases
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 are immune to antibiotics. Aside from the biological concern, there is an economic one,
these GMO
Change the determiner
this GMO food cost
these GMO food costs
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food
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 cost extravagant and most
of
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apply
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people
Add an article
the people
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 cannot afford
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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.
Thus
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, organic
foods
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 are cheaper and healthier than GMO
foods
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. In conclusion, I disagreed that
the
Correct article usage
apply
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genetically modified
food
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 is a sustainable solution
for
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to
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this
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problem
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. I think there are other ways to solve
this
Linking Words
problem
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. I think that it should be the responsibility of everyone to sustain our environment and be conscious about the consumption of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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natural
food
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resources
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.
Submitted by noppapat_k on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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