IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some people believe that an armed police force would cause a high level of violence in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #police #force #level #violence #society
Armouries and explosives, since the day they were invented, have become an indispensable means to maintain peace. It is,
however
, believed by a certain number of citizens that equipping
policemen
 with heavy weapons would lead to
severe
Add an article
the severe
show examples
 battery to the public. In
this
 essay, I will challenge
this
 school of thought.
Firstly
,
policemen
, especially special troops, have always been carrying pistols and electric batons for years, yet almost never have any out-of-control cases been recorded.
In other words
, being certified for carrying weapons is what defines
policemen
. The image of a sheriff in uniform with a star on his chest and a gun hanging on his belt has been embedded into people’s minds as a signal of power and a sense of security.
Additionally
, had it not been for the reaction of armed
policemen
 during robberies or terrorism, hardly can we imagine the damage that would have been dealt with by the stakeholders.
Secondly
, security forces are well-trained people with high responsibility. To be qualified, apart from having a spotless record and studying vigorously for the entrance exam, one must have gone through a strict and harsh training process that lasts for years, not only for combat skills but
also
 soft skills necessary in social situations. Having that in mind, there is not the slightest chance that an officer would take out his gun and pull the trigger without well-thought-of the consequences.
Besides
, since working for the government, which is ultimately owned by citizens, a policeman has to be responsible for any disadvantageous action towards residential members. Ergo, no man would risk his career by hurting others for no reason. In conclusion, a police force armed with weapons is unlikely to cause any brutalities to the society owing to their thorough training process and a high sense of responsibility.
Submitted by nganle.ashley on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: