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Band 7

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #sense #competition #children #adults
It is argued that teenagers ought to be shown how to compete, while other people say that in order to be a better person,
children
 need to have the spirit of
cooperation
instead
 of
competition
.
Although
cooperation
 will help
children
 to become excellent
team
 player,
competition
on the other hand
 will enhance
children
’s ability to be prepared for the
future
. On the one hand,
team
 goals and objectives could be attained when each member cooperate and work in unison.
This
 means that a
team
 of
children
 could combine their efforts towards achieving success by not relenting and encouraging themselves.
Furthermore
, there would be a failure in the
team
 if there is the presence of any weak link among the members.
For example
, the
cooperation
 among the under-13 football
team
 of Nigeria that went for African tournament in Uganda won the final match simply because they played together towards the end. In my opinion, coming together with some players will merely be to achieve
team
 goals, which is definitely not as important as personal and
future
 aspirations.
On the other hand
,
competition
 skills in
children
 will allow them to prepare for
future
 endeavours.
That is
 to say that inculcating
this
 behaviour in
children
 will allow them to do well in life because it is required in a workplace where people are being ranked at the end of every year in order for the company to be able to recognize the best performers.
For instance
, it is shown that
children
 that are pushed to excel than their peers are better after some years because they have been taught that success in life comes not only by hard-working but by
also
 being competitive.
Therefore
, I agree that working to be the best will take someone
further
 in life than simply working along with others. In conclusion, despite the fact that some are of the school of thought that
cooperation
 should be taught to school
children
 because it might help the
team
 achieve success;
however
, I suggest that
competition
 is more preferable as it will be advantageous in the
future
 working environment.
Submitted by felix on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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