IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Childhood obesity is becoming a serious problem in many countries. Some people believe that this is an illness and should be treated medically. Others feel that this is only a result of unhealthy habits and it is sport that must help. Discuss both point of view and give your own opinion.

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it is undeniable fact that in most of
nations
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the nations
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 obesity is
main
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the main
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meance
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meant
means
 for children. While many people are in favour of using medical treatment to tackle
the
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apply
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obesity. On other hand,some folks
thinks
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think
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 unhealthy lifestyle is responsible for
devloping
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developing
 the obesity in offsprings. In the following
paragraphs
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,paragraphs
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i
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I
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 will
dicuss
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discuss
 both views of society.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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