Some believe that the Olympic games help bring people from different nations together, while others claim that holding the Olympics wastes money which could be used for important issues.
Many
people
claim that the Olympic games
are beneficial in connecting people
from all around the globe together; however
, other people
insist that the Olympics
are too pricey for what they offer, and the budget of the games
could be used on something more crucial. I am going to discuss the arguments of both sides and express my honest opinion on the matter.
Firstly
, I believe it crucial to underline the rich history and success of the Olympic games
throughout the years. The Olympics
were a primary weapon in tackling the issue of racial hate. By bringing people
and athletes even from the most distant nations to compete in an ideally healthy competition environment, Olympics
achieved in connecting humans that would never do Correct article usage
the Olympics
otherwise
and broaden
the boundaries of many individuals. Correct subject-verb agreement
broadens
As a result
, nationalism and racism declined. Therefore
, the Olympics
helped create a more peaceful and understanding world
. For instance
, there are historical examples where two top athletes from rival countries created a friendly bond together through their passion for the same sport, giving the right model to the citizens watching the broadcasted event.
On the other side of the spectrum, plenty of people
claim that the Olympics
are not offering enough to the world
to justify their cost. It is indeed true that the event's organisation is extremely costly, especially in a world
where problems like world
hunger and homelessness still exist. Therefore
, it is wise to spend this
enormous amount of money on tackling those issues rather than organising a sporting event.
In conclusion, I firmly believe that despite the tremendous cost of organising the Olympic games
, they justify the expenses by dealing with plenty of crucial global social problems and contributing to world
peace and stability.Submitted by Joanna on
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coherence and cohesion
Well done on addressing both sides of the argument and providing your opinion at the end. Make sure to connect your ideas more smoothly throughout the essay.
task achievement
You have effectively responded to the task by discussing both perspectives and giving your opinion. Ensure to provide more specific examples to strengthen your arguments further.
task achievement
The essay effectively presents arguments from both sides of the issue and concludes with a clear opinion.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-developed and provide a strong framework for the essay.
Your opinion
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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?