Many museums charge for the entries while others are free? Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission for museum outweigh disadvantages?

Many
museums
around the world are imposing
fees
for the visit but some of it waives their entry
fees
for the visitors.
Museum
are
Change the verb form
is

The plural verb are does not appear to agree with the singular subject Museum. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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cultural
Add an article
a cultural

The noun phrase cultural heritage seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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heritage for every country and
also
it is transmitting the history of ancestors to
next
generation. I am inclined to believe the merits of charging the public for the permit is far outweigh its demerits.
To begin
with, most people at least have visited the
museum
once in their lifetime. It is a proud symbol of the culture and customs of indigenous society.
Therefore
, every
museum
should preserve and maintain to the core. If
museums
are charged for entry, which can limit the visitors, and eventually it can be prevented from exploitation. Many famous tourist attractions have already been damaged by overcrowded
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers

The spelling of travelers is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

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.
Furthermore
, ancient monuments and antique arts in the
museum
need to be kept intact. The preservation techniques cost thousands of dollars annually. The maintenance cost would be a burden for the government.
Instead
, the charged entrance
fees
for the visitor can utilize for
it's
Replace the word
its

It appears that the contraction it's should be a possessive pronoun instead. Consider changing it.

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expenditures.
However
, the payment for the visitors could inhibit the arrival of local people.
Thus
the young
populatuon
Correct your spelling
population

The word populatuon is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

in the locality would not be able to know the culture, inherited arts and other forms of traditions.  To conclude, charging
fees
for the viewers in
museums
will minimize the visitor and
therefore
it can be prevented from exploitation.
Hence
the benefits of entry
fees
of
museums
outweigh the drawbacks.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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