IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Advertisements are becoming more and more common in everyday live. Is it a positive or negative development?

#advertisements #development
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The issue of the growing tendency of advertising
to
Change preposition
in
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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modern life has been raising a lot of debates. Some might say that
,
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apply
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Use synonyms
advertisement
Add an article
the advertisement
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 brings a lot of benefit to both businesses and client.
On the other hand
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, others
insists
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insist
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 on the opinion that advertising increases the cost of the advertised commodity. Viewing from my perspectives, I personally think that
advertisement
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 has both advantages and disadvantages.
To begin
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 with,
advertisement
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 becomes an inevitable tool for the company.
Firstly
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, advertising creates corporate brand value by creating contents and logos.
For example
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, the popular Nike’ Just Do It slogan has attracted a lot of
purchaser
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purchasers
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to buy their shoes so that their sales and profits have increased significantly.
Secondly
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,
customer
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the customer
a customer
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 could know the information of new-launched
product
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 and have more choices for the demand.
For instance
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, Nike’ company has released
variety
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a variety
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 of products
such
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 as shoes for lifestyle or sports to meet the needs of customers and promoting
this
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 on the website to help customers get clear details of the
product
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.
Finally
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, advertising generates many job opportunities
such
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 as content creator, a designer so that it reduces the unemployment rate in the world.
On the contrary
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, other people think that the cost of commercial activities is expensive so that customer has to bear high prices when they buy the advertised brand.
However
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, most customer nowadays finds out the information and select the new
product
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 through advertising. In conclusion,
Use synonyms
advertisement
Change the article
an advertisement
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 is a form of modern business that every company needs and get customers to have the best choices with high qualified
product
Use synonyms
Submitted by nguyenhoangbaochau870 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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