The inequality between rich and poor nations is now wider than it has ever been before. What do you think are the main causes of this difference and what do you think can be done to reduce the gap?

#inequality #nations #difference #gap

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The inequality between privileged and underprivileged

nations

proliferates

Change preposition

with

show examples

passing

Correct article usage

the passing

show examples

days. There are two main causes behind

this

occurrence including

uneducation

Correct your spelling

education

and overpopulation.

This

essay will put forward optimal solutions to

this

pressing problem. First and foremost, being unlettered is a prominent reason for

this

significant concern. Uneducated people cannot find their desirable jobs, so they cannot be involved in their nation's contribution,

whereas

the educated find their admirable jobs, leading to

the

Correct article usage

show examples

continuous increase in earnings.

Therefore

, these skilful citizens are more likely to contribute more powerfully to national development.

This

incident may have severe repercussions for

nations

' economic growth, and it makes a difference between countries. To narrow the gap, those in power should erect state schools with quality education for the needy and help them achieve decent occupations. With a more competent workforce, society will thrive faster, and

this

harmful phenomenon will end.

Furthermore

, overpopulation is a primary reason for discrepancies between wealthy and poverty-stricken

nations

. To be more specific, natural resources have become scarce in areas where uncontrolled population growth is taking place.

As a result

, civilians of the

nations

may face a shortage of daily

necessaries

Replace the word

necessities

show examples

and, in a worst-case scenario, be prone to a financial crisis, impoverishing these lands. To mitigate

this

trend, the stronger countries should provide financial aid to the weaker ones, and authorities in more fiscally disadvantaged communities should give all of the dwellers proper knowledge and training about population and birth control, a catalyst for societal blossoming. In conclusion, one of the leading root causes of the difference between rich and poor countries is illiteracy. So, everyone must receive early age quality education, and it is wise to say that the whole world is a giant family living together, and the suffering of one will take

the

Correct article usage

show examples

smile from the other's face. Helping each other should be the principal priority.

Submitted by trananh.khang159 on Thu Apr 15 2021

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Task Response

Task Response: The essay provides a comprehensive response to the question, including two main causes and solutions to reduce the gap. However, the response could be improved by providing more specific examples and elaborating on the solutions.

Coherence and Cohesion

Coherence and Cohesion: The essay demonstrates a logical structure with a clear introduction and conclusion. The main points are supported and presented in a coherent manner. However, the essay could benefit from stronger connections between ideas and more varied cohesive devices to enhance coherence.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

310 words

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The inequality between rich and poor nations is now wider than it has ever been before. What do you think are the main causes of this difference and what do you think can be done to reduce the gap?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

While studying abroad provides an opportunity to broaden one’s experience, as also present the danger of letting influence from the host culture. How far do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Open plan office no walls, no barriers. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

You should spend about 40 mins. Write about the following topic: Many people think that mobile phones should be banned in public places such as libraries, shops and public transport. Do you agree or disagree?

In today's world many people own a smartphonem.Do you think the advantages of owning a smartphone outweigh the disadvantages?

In some cities public parks and open space are being changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own fruits and vegetables. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?