Due to so many young people dropping out of schools, the rate of unemployment is increasing, and it affects our society in a different way. In your opinion, how can this situation be improved?

Nowadays, the number of unemployed

people

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is rising because young

people

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are giving up their education.

This

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situation has a negative impact on society in many ways.

Therefore

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this

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essay will discuss the possible solutions towards the issue.

To begin

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with, the reason why

people

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drop out of

school

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is mainly

due to

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financial pressure. They are troubled financially, yet they need money to pay for their education and

school

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supplies. It is an inevitable mindset, as older

people

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should be responsible for the financial security of their children. Another reason why

this

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phenomenon happened is that they are struggling in

school

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For instance

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, many children find it difficult to keep up with the lessons, and that causes a lack of motivation.

Furthermore

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, children with poor relationships tend to be indifferent in academics. Society can overcome these issues with the help of the government.

First,

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the government can implement financial support for students from low-income families.

For instance

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, Indonesia has implemented Smart Indonesia Card (KIP) for students to help them pay for their institutions

as well as

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their

school

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supplies. Another improvement can be handled by the

school

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to set a program where they can acknowledge students’ interests and help them understand the suitable learning methods.

In other words

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, they can figure out whether they have trouble in academics or in society, and teachers will be able to organise

such

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programs or mentorships to situations that young

people

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currently face. In conclusion, the government and schools play a crucial role in the rate of unemployment, as it is connected to the education system. For that reason, I believe both institutions should give sponsorships and guidance for young

people

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to stimulate their interest in study.

fabercastell

Dec 26, 2025

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planning

Plan your essay with a clear start, middle, and end. Have a short intro, two body parts with each one main idea, then a short conclusion.

content

language

content

Clear aim to help young people stay in school.

coherence

Use linking words like First and In conclusion to show order.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

284 words

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Due to so many young people dropping out of schools, the rate of unemployment is increasing, and it affects our society in a different way. In your opinion, how can this situation be improved?

Over population in many major urban centers around the world is a major problem, what are the causes of it and how can it be solved

Many people say that universities should only be offered to young students with high marks,others say that they should accept people of all ages,even if they did not do well.Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The use of mobile phone is as antisocial as smoking. Smoking is banned in certain places so mobile phone should be banned like smoking. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some parents allow their teenage children to live independently, away from home. Other parents don’t want their teenage children to live away from them. Which do you think is better and why? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer

Some people say that economic growth is the only way to end hunger and poverty, while others say that economic growth is damaging environment so it must be stopped. Disscuss both view and give your opinion?