IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

You used a moving service to move your house.At your new address you discovered that some of the items were damaged.Write a letter to a manager of a company. *Give details of your move. *Describe your damage. *What you would like than to do

#service #move #house #address #items #manager #company #*give #*describe #damage #*what
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Dear Sir/Madam, I am writing to bring to your attention the dissatisfaction I got with your recent service. I would like to inform you that on 10th March
2024
Add a comma
2024,
show examples
 I used your service to move my stuff from Brampton to Calgary
due to
Linking Words
 my new Job.I was very excited about my move but unfortunately, it turned into sadness as soon as my belongings reached there.
Firstly
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, I did not realize the damage that happened to my king-size bed set but as soon as I placed the mattress on it, the right leg of the bed broke down. There was no other option for me at that time
instead
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 of purchasing a new one.I was not able to figure out the reason why it happened, but most probably might be a lack of poor packaging at the time of loading in the truck. I would like to suggest that please look into
this
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 matter with your moving team. So I came to know how it took place.One possible solution could be to compensate you
according to
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 your company policy even I am attaching my bill of invoice for the bed set with
this
Linking Words
 letter as well. Looking forward to hearing from you soon. Yours faithfully, Sunny Garg
Submitted by sunnygarg710 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure every paragraph elaborates on a single idea without mixing various points within the same paragraph, maintaining a comprehensive flow.
coherence cohesion
Begin your letter with a proper greeting, introduce your concern clearly, and end with a suitable closing - which you've done well.
task achievement
To maximize task response, your letter should cover all parts of the prompt in depth. Be thorough in providing specific details about the move, the damaged items, and your expectations for resolution.
task achievement
Maintaining a polite tone is crucial in complaint letters. Phrases like 'I am writing to bring to your attention' and 'Looking forward to hearing from you soon' are excellent. For even better results, consider slightly more formal language and phrasing.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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