IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that art lessons, such as painting and drawing lessons, should be compulsory in secondary schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #art #lessons #schools
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Some individuals believe that it is necessary to learn
art
subjects
 like painting and singing in middle school. I strongly agree with
this
 statement because
art
 disciplines will help
students
 to learn science
subjects
 and it is a good way to release stress. The main reason of make
art
 courses on the curriculum is that they could be conducive to learning
subjects
 like math and biology. Creating arts push the
students
 to use their imagination, to be creative, to think outside the box which are the sets of skills used in problem-solving.
Students
 who are good at
art
 might
also
 perform better in science
subjects
.
For example
, many scientists were excellent at painting or playing musical instruments like Albert Einstein. Another reason for mandatory and study in
art
 is simply because it is a great way to relax. There is no right or wrong in
art
,
students
 do not need to suffer from the stress of ensuring everything is right.
As a result
, pupils will just enjoy the process of generating artworks rather than searching for a fixed answer for a hard subject like physics. A recent study shows that near 45% of
students
 in middle school considered reading and drawing comics were nice methods to escape from loads of heavy homework for a while. In conclusion, I agree with the statement that
students
 must learn
art
-related
subjects
 with other
subjects
 together in secondary school because studying
art
 subject could be helpful on study other courses and it will support them to de-stress.
Submitted by Sue on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • foster
  • creativity
  • self-expression
  • curriculum
  • mental well-being
  • stress reduction
  • unearth
  • hidden talents
  • compulsory
  • equality
  • disengagement
  • motivation
  • additional resources
  • financial strain
  • core subjects
  • well-rounded
  • critical thinking
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