IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people say it is more important to plant trees in the open spaces in towns and cities than to build more housing. To what extant do you agree or disagree?

#people #plant #trees #spaces #towns #cities
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There has been a remarkably increasing on the number of
people
 believe that planting much more
trees
 in the vacant areas rather than building structures
such
 as house or skyscraper is more significant. In my opinion,
this
 thesis is decisively true because of some clear reasons. In my essay, I will explain how threes have a great role in our daily life by giving some examples. On the one hand, the human being is destitute to a basic thing called oxygen.
In addition
 to
this
,
people
 cannot generate
this
 gas on their own.
Therefore
, plants are living with a view to producing
this
 vital factor.
Moreover
, carbon dioxide, which is given outside by individuals contrary to plants, is consumed by
trees
 for the sake of
people
 health.
For instance
, according to an investigation conducted by a famous university called Cambridge, sick
people
 are recommended to make a natural walk between
trees
 in order to expose themselves to high-quality clear air.
Secondly
, making giant houses or offices yield bad result.
In addition
,
this
 consequence
restrict
Change the verb form
restricts
show examples
 not only citizens but
also
 animals place of
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
 areas. Since, while those
building
Change the determiner
buildings
show examples
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 constructing, lots of natural environment are destructing inherently.
Thus
, a rise in the number and places of
trees
 open new, beautiful areas for
people
 and animals.
For example
, some wild species of animals
in particular
 in Australia come up at homes or gardens because of the perishing of their natural living spaces. In
this
 information mentioned above, it can be clearly said that
trees
 have taken over responsibilities for us.
Therefore
, we have to express determination to raise the number of green places.
Submitted by Burak on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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