Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each other, while others think that people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
It is argued by some that
nowadas
people have become more dependent on others, due to the development of newer ways of communication. I completely disagree with that statement and believe that we are more independent today, because of the strong competition in the working market of the modern world.
On the one hand, some think that the technological advancements regarding how we communicate today with each other have turned us to be more dependent. Digital communication platforms, Correct your spelling
nowadays
such
as Whatsup and Telegram, are growing rapidly in popularity and as a consequence
most of our activities are being performed Add a comma
,consequence
oniline
with others. Correct your spelling
online
For example
, in my hospital where I am currently working as a physician, most of the decesions
concerning the Correct your spelling
decisions
managment
of patients lives are being taken online, by several doctors, together.
Correct your spelling
management
On the other hand
, I believe that the will to succeed in our modern world has transformed us to be less dependent. Nowadays, more and more individuals are aiming for more meaningful careers and trying to earn as much money as they can. Due to that sort of competition, people are becoming more independent, in order to gain more success than their rivals. For instance
, in my country, fellowships programs in medicine are highly competitive these days. As a result
, young doctors are trying to acheive
as many awards as they can during their residency, by working alone.
In conclusion, differing views exist regarding the question of how dependent we are now, Correct your spelling
achieve
compare
to how we were in the past. I strongly believe that Change the form of the verb
compared
becuase
we are now more competitive as a society, we have become more independent.Correct your spelling
because
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite