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Band 6.5

Television dominates the free-time for too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socialising with others. Do you agree or disagree? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#television #free-time #people #reason
Since the advent of television, it has gone through a revolutionary change, at
first
, it was used as a medium for audiovisual news and entertainment at a certain
time
 of the day only. Nowadays, people are all the
time
 glued on their TV Screens sparing no
time
 for any physical activity and social interaction with other people. I completely agree, the main reason behind
this
 situation is unchecked viewing of television to kill
time
.
This
 essay will analyze the reasons causing
this
 phenomenon in the below paragraphs. To commence with, The main reason that
lead
Change the verb form
leads
show examples
 to a drastic change in peoples mentality on television viewing is binge-worthy shows and movies, which keeps the
person
 interested in the story for a longer period of
time
 with tactics of delaying the climax and suddenly twisting the plot.
As a result
, making
person
time
 worthwhile. At the same ,
time
such
 serials sow the seed of procrastination in
person
Correct article usage
a person
show examples
 mind creating false notions and confusion on priorities.
For example
, Game of Thrones garnered a million views final episode on a streaming site. a number of experts say more than a million hours of manpower was wasted when that final episode streamed. That many hours could have used productively by the fans of the show.
Secondly
, Some video channels create clickbait videos which
Change the verb form
have
show examples
has
Add the particle
tohas
show examples
 seduce the
person
 to stream their content, which eventually creates no value in the
person
Replace the word
personal
show examples
 life and
therefore
, waste
time
 only. Recent research has shown that excessive streaming can reduce the attention span of an individual hampering their learning capabilities. In Conclusion, I firmly believe that excessive TV watching is the main culprit causing making people
lead
Fix the infinitive
to lead
show examples
 a sedentary lifestyle and adopting anti-social behaviour. Some mitigation and rehabilitation plan should be in place to control
this
 epidemic.
Submitted by Monty  on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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