Some people say that playing computer games is bad for children , whereas others Some people say that playing computer games is bad for children, whereas others say that it has positive effects on the way children develop. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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The

computer

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game

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industry is a part of our world today. From its humble beginnings in the 80s, The

computer

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game

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industry is a part of our world today. From its humble beginnings in the 80s, the

video

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game

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industry has exploded into a 10-billion-dollar empire. It is a debatable issue whether these

games

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are good or bad. In

this

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essay, I intend to delve into the pros and cons of these

games

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. I personally believe that these

games

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are good, but only if played in moderation. There are many advantages

Change preposition

show examples

playing

computer

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games

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To begin

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with,

video

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games

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introduce

children

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computer

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technology.

Secondly

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, some

games

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provide practice in

problem solving

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problem-solving

show examples

and logic, e.g. Age of Empires.

Video

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games

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have proved to improve visual skills. They

also

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improve motor and spatial skills.

Children

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who play

video

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games

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have better reflexes.What is more, these modern

games

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make learning fun. The cost of failure is lower.

This

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encourages risk-taking and exploration. If the child gets the answer wrong or their character dies, he just starts the

game

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over and tries again.

Finally

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, some

games

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have therapeutic applications.

On the other hand

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, there are some disadvantages of these technological inventions.

Firstly

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, over-dependence on these

games

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leads to social isolation, as these are usually played alone.

Secondly

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, some

games

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have violent characters, and seeing their violent acts leads to aggressive behaviour in

children

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Moreover

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, these

games

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can confuse reality and fantasy.

For example

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, when

children

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play car-racing

games

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then

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they may race their own vehicles in real life, which can lead to accidents.

Finally

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, these

games

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are addicting and once a child sits to play these

games

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, time flies and everything else,

such

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as studies and outdoor

games

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is forgotten, which is indubitably bad. To summarise, on the whole, these

games

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are very good and certainly their advantages outweigh their disadvantages, but these should be played in balance. Parents should limit the

game

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playing time and see to it that homework and other important chores are done before playing.

yektaghandi.78Wed Jan 22 2025

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task achievement

To enhance task achievement further, consider expanding on how games teach problem-solving or motor skills with additional examples or studies.

coherence cohesion

For coherence and cohesion, try using more varied transitional phrases to connect ideas smoothly between paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

The introduction sets a balanced stage for discussion by stating a clear perspective with the promise to explore both sides.

task achievement

The essay presents detailed points supporting both the positive and negative effects of computer games, demonstrating an in-depth analysis.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion effectively summarises the arguments and personal opinion, bringing the discussion full circle.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

337 words

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Some people say that playing computer games is bad for children , whereas others Some people say that playing computer games is bad for children, whereas others say that it has positive effects on the way children develop. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people feel that manufactures and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of foods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

many parts of the world people are relying more and more on prepared food from grocery stores and restaurants because they are too busy to cook at home .this is bad because home cooked food is much better for us to what extend do you agree or disagree ?

Many people around the world use social media to keep in touch with other people and get new events. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that success in life comes from hardwork and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.