Do you think that parents should be punished if their five-year-old child commits a crime? From what age should children be held responsible for their own behaviours?

All the
parents
are responsible for their offspring’s
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
whether bad ones or good ones. Every parent has their own way of treating to deal with
wrong
Correct article usage
the wrong
show examples
activities of their five-year-old
children
. Some
parents
prefer to perform some punishments on their
children
which I do believe that
this
is completely an
unfavorable
Change the spelling
unfavourable
show examples
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
to punish a little child.
Furthermore
, some people argue that
children
themselves should shoulder
their
Change the pronoun
the
show examples
responsibility
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
their own treats from a specific
age
. As far as I am concerned the best
age
for
children
to be responsible about their acts is
age
Add an article
the age
show examples
of
ten
.
Parents
play a crucial role in
children
’s
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
in future;
however
, some
parents
make negative impacts on their
children
by punishing them that in most cases, the adverse impacts on
children
could not be solved easily. Albeit punishing has many kinds, psychologists declared that any kind of penalizing could lead
children
to severe mental issues in future.
Therefore
,
parents
should give the matter their attention to be more considerate in behaving with their offspring. I do believe the best way for approaching
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
children
as they conduct an unlawful act is
talking
Change the verb form
to talk
show examples
to them in a good manner along with having ample sympathy. The more
parents
treat their
children
positively, the more their
children
will be prosperous in future.
In addition
, some
parents
argue that
children
should be responsible for what they do from a certain
age
which I do believe that the
age
of
ten
is the best
age
for that. The reason why I hold
this
idea lies
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
this
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
fact that the
ten
years old child has
this
ability to distinguish a bad or a good manner.
Thus
, they need to be responsible for their
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
show examples
in any cases. Despite
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
the fact that some people mention that
this
age
is soon for taking responsibility, the scientists who performed a study on some
ten
-year-old
children
draw
this
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
conclusion that these
children
have
this
wisdom to recognize
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
bad or good manners. So, the
age
of
ten
is the best
age
to start being responsible for
children
. To sum up, by taking all
above-mentioned
Correct article usage
the above-mentioned
show examples
arguments into consideration
this
conclusion can be drawn that
parents
should
be pay
Change the verb form
be paying
be paid
show examples
more attention to their
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
with their
children
to not hurt their mentality.
Furthermore
, for
whom
Correct pronoun usage
those
show examples
who thinks there should be an
age
for
children
to take their own responsibility, the
age
of
ten
is the best because they can realize the bad and good manners.
Submitted by amiralzde on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!