IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that news has no connection with people’s lives; so it is a waste of time to read newspapers and watch television news programmes. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In the ultra-modern epoch, reading newspapers and watching
news
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channels
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 are being opposed,
due to
Linking Words
 the reason that they do not provide any knowledge related to the living style of certain
people
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. I partially agree with
this
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 notion, I will explicate my viewpoints in the subsequent paragraphs. To commence with, there is a wide array of reasons why
people
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 reckon that reading or watching the
news
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 is not worth their time. The most significant reason is that
news
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 companies are now known to be under the control of the government
that is
Linking Words
 under rule.
Moreover
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, government officials give them permission only to show or print the
news
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 that favours them and boycott the ones that may destroy their reputation.
Consequently
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,
people
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 are kept away from the basic knowledge about what is happening around them.
For example
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, in India, a farmers' protest is being conducted by
people
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,
due to
Linking Words
 which roads are blocked and
people
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 are unable to travel between two states that are Haryana and Punjab. But,
this
Linking Words
 is not being shown on any television channel or newspaper, and owing to
this
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people
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 are not aware of the road blockage.
Thus
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,
people
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 suffer from some problems whilst driving in these areas. Despite the arguments, there are a plethora of disagreements about
this
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 phenomenon. First and foremost, there are still some newspapers and
channels
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 that provide the
news
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 about the robberies happening in some places. In Brampton,
for instance
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, there were some car thieves, who used to steal cars from peoples' driveways by breaking into their vehicles.
Therefore
Linking Words
, almost all the
news
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channels
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 covered
this
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news
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 once a day and helped it to widely spread in the city.
Thus
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,
people
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 became aware of
this
Linking Words
 and took some decisive steps for the safety of their cars.
Hence
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,
news
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channels
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 still have a connection with
people
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's lives and can be worth watching sometimes.
To conclude
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, I would like to argue that
although
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news
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 organizations do not provide all the information that suits
people
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's interests, they are still worth their time in some situations.

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coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure by ensuring that all arguments are consistently developed and seamlessly connected.
task achievement
Enhance clear and comprehensive ideas by elaborating more on each point and ensuring clarity in expressing arguments.
task achievement
The essay provides relevant, specific examples to support the main points.
coherence cohesion
Both an introduction and a conclusion are present, effectively framing the argument.
coherence cohesion
Main points are supported reasonably well.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • essential information
  • local events
  • public health
  • impact
  • political developments
  • participating
  • democratic processes
  • international news
  • global issues
  • interconnectedness
  • economic news
  • personal financial decisions
  • investments
  • cultural news
  • social awareness
  • community engagement
  • selective consumption
  • knowledgeable
  • pertinent matters
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