IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #time #loss #species #plants #animals
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
some people argue that the primary environmental issue we are facing is that the loss of specific species of
plants
 and
animals
. While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 others believe that humans have to combat bigger problems. I believe there are more important environmental problems to tackle with it. on the one hand, human activities like mass construction have contributed to deforestation and losing
animals
. Many species of
plants
 and
animals
 have eliminated from the ecosystem many
animals
 are on the verge of extinction.
Therefore
, the chain of food will harm, and in the long-term many
plants
 and
animals
 because of the shortage of food will disappear.
As a result
, the life of human being will get in danger in the long run,as our source of food is vanishing.
on the other hand
, as I mentioned human activities have caused many problems, but one major issue is global warming. With the warming of the
earth
Add a comma
,earth
show examples
 ice caps are melting,and the surface of the seas are increasing.
As a result
, many towns and villages are in danger of flooding.
Also
, CO2 from gas emissions from factories have caused older people can not to breathe properly,and they have got asthma.
In other words
, like
animals
 and ,
plants
 the life of us are in danger of extinction. in conclusion, in my opinion,our future is more important compared to the loss of
animals
 and
plants
, and we should take some practical measures to tackle global warming.
Submitted by maleki.ali94 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • extinction
  • habitat loss
  • ecosystem
  • food chain
  • imbalance
  • interconnected
  • climate change
  • pollution
  • personal actions
  • policy changes
  • education
  • awareness
What to do next:
Look at other essays: