There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than international music heard everywhere nowadays?

Most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
believe that
music
is the food for the soul.
Music
has many different types, namely, classic, jazz, RnB, ballad, hip hop and many more.
Firstly
,
people
need
music
to relax. Due to many stressors in society nowadays,
music
is
one
of the reasons that releases stress in
one
's body.
For example
, after strenuous work the whole
day
in the office,
people
love
to lie down on a couch and listen to mellow
music
, which can be relaxing and gentle to the soul.
Secondly
,
people
need
music
to have a fruitful
day
. Most of the individuals turn on the
music
player upon waking up in order to be awake.
For instance
, even there are so many works to be done in a
day
, listening to hip hop or lively
music
will give the determination to finish all the tasks in a happy mood.
In addition
, nowadays there is more international
music
that has been released through radio and online like on other social media. But there is nothing that can beat the traditional
music
of a country.
For example
, in the Philippines, most artists
love
to create
love
songs. Creating a song wholeheartedly can have a great impact on the listeners. Everyone has the capacity to be in the situation in a way the
music
delivers. But even there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
so much international
music
today, the traditional
one
is still beneficial to
one
's country. In conclusion,
people
need
music
in everyday life, for relaxation and enjoyment in order to boost the moods they have on that certain
day
.
Although
there is some personal preference in choosing what kind of
music
they
love
.
Submitted by Nadz_nadz on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • emotional release
  • cultural significance
  • globalization
  • cultural exchange
  • technology
  • preservation
  • cultural heritage
  • social cohesion
  • expression
  • consumption
  • production
  • traditional music
  • international music
  • diversity
  • identity
What to do next:
Look at other essays: