Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest times of most people's lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibilities. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
The singular countable noun responsibility follows the quantifier many, which requires a plural noun. Consider using a plural noun or a different quantifier.
The noun phrase essay seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.
The plural verb do does not appear to agree with the singular subject example. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.
It appears that you have an unnecessary comma before the dependent clause marker so that. Consider removing the comma.
The word hangout doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- in additional
- for example
- for instance
- even though