Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. This has more advantages or disadvantages.

Nowadays it is becoming extremely competitive to find and hold a job. People have to
work
long
hours
of
work
in order to be able to pay for their expenses.
Therefore
, no
time
is left for one to enjoy their
life
and doing fun activities. In my ,opinion
this
has more drawbacks than benefits as it can negatively impact our mental health and the natural
purpose
of our
life
.
First
of all, not having a
work
and
life
balance is the number reason for depression.
In other words
, if we keep on working without having
time
to do what we love to do, after a while we get exhausted and depressed. According to some researches, the risk of suicide among people who are working more than 250
hours
a month is 20 per cent more than
work
the average of 160
hours
and that has nothing to do with the amount of money they make.
Thus
, in order to have a normal
life
with normal mental health, we need to have some
time
off
work
. It is sometimes hard to sometimes follow the
purpose
of
life
when we are too engaged in our
work
and have no
time
to do what we really love to do outside
work
. by ,that I mean literally thinking for a
second
why we are working and what is the
purpose
of
life
. Do we have to
work
for money or money has to
work
for us
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
If we do not have enough
time
to spend on some activities that make us happy because we are busy
then
when we want to really enjoy our
life
.
Therefore
, by looking at the
purpose
of our
life
we will realise that
life
is not only about
hours
we spend at
work
and it's mostly about to do we have
time
to enjoy ourselves. To conclude,
life
is too short and we need to find a good balance between our
work
and our joy in
life
. If we
work
long
hours
and have no
time
for leisure activities, we will get depressed and lose the
purpose
of our being on
this
planet.
Submitted by armiario139 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: