IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that the goverment is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree?

#people #goverment #money #arts
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It has been a
contraversial
Correct your spelling
controversial
argue
Replace the word
argument
show examples
 that the
governments
Use synonyms
' investment
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the crafts whether a waste of
money
Use synonyms
 or a necessary part of life.
Governments
Use synonyms
 collect
money
Use synonyms
 from their citizens in order to open some sort of facilities.I completely disagree
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that the
governments
Use synonyms
 should not invest
money
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 social skills
such
Linking Words
 as
arts
Use synonyms
 and entertainments . In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern
life
Add a comma
,life
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 people are connected by artcrafts so without music,dance or painting can not exist.
In other words
Linking Words
,
arts
Use synonyms
 are
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
medicine for humanity
also
Linking Words
 for
animal
Add an article
the animal
an animal
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
,
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
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 are treating
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
cancer
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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need
an
Correct article usage
apply
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high strong medicine and
also
Linking Words
 music can decrease their pain and
treate
Correct your spelling
treat
treated
create
 them in a
natrul
Correct your spelling
natural
 way.
This
Linking Words
 is why the
governments
Use synonyms
 should
also
Linking Words
 invest
money
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
Use synonyms
arts
Change the noun form
art
show examples
 skills.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,investing
money
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 crafts can lead a place to make
an extra jobs
Correct the article-noun agreement
an extra job
extra jobs
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which can work many people there.
This
Linking Words
 would be possible to decrease the amount of unemployment.
For
Linking Words
example
Add a comma
,example
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 a dance team
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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encouraged by
government
Add an article
the government
a government
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they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can show their performance in certain places.
Therefore
Linking Words
,more investment in other areas can give another chance for other people. In conclusion,there are works has to be done by
governments
Use synonyms
this
Linking Words
is not only build
Change the verb form
does not only build
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 some facilities
such
Linking Words
 as hospitals and schools
also
Linking Words
 should leave a piece of pie from the whole to encourage
arts
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by cmnr3134 on

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Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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